may angels lead you in

I was so afraid for the day I would get the email sent to my blackberry saying your website had an urgent update.
Yesterday, it finally arrived.
My best memory of us together was the day we serenaded all the boys in the neighbor with our rendition of the spice girls. I fondly remember you lip singing and dancing around while I threw cereal at them. Something about the spice girls always made us so happy, especially the time you dressed up as Posh and I dressed up as Sporty Spice and my dad took us to the mall to make sticker pictures at Limited Too.
For a year I followed your carepages, which updated me everyday on your treatment.
It was the closet I had felt to you in years.
I was so positive you would pull through, especially since Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia had such a high cure rate.
Never did I imagine we would lose you, but yesterday you could not fight anymore.
I'm upset but at the same time I know you were in pain and this was the best thing for you.

R.I.P Rebecca Michelle Kearney

fuck cancer

You were my first best friend in Virginia, and shortly we will lose you.
It baffles me how things like this can happen to such good people. Becca never deserved to come down with cancer. I always thought better her though, because she is such a fighter and so determined.
Today that changed though.
The doctors are stopping treatment and letting her "be comfortable from now on"
How can one be comfortable with death, especially a young 20 year old who is supposed to have years to live?

I honestly just don't know how to feel about anything anymore.
I'm losing my faith

floor plan to my heart

"look at me, I'm Jul1ee
classy, sassy, and now a blondie
wont go to bed till I have a clonopin
oh look I'm jeppin Julie"

to the tune of Sandra D
written by my room mate Caroline

I say 2 months
and I'll be institutionalized.

I don't know whats right and what's real anymore

How things have changed within the past two weeks
I'm going to keep this short and sweet and just list them off

. moved into my house
.within the next 21 days if we have a noise complaint we get evicted....sweet
. I'm very blonde
. Zack Harton
. a new amazing job, second job
. rent due tomorrow, erg
. money problems but nothing is new there

train wreck

This has been the weirdest week ever
EEEEEEEVVVVVEEEEEERRRRR

spayed

Baby Delta got fixed today
now she is laying next me restless and letting out such heart aching sighs
I really wish they would send animals home with painkillers
I mean, they only cut her abdomen open and took out her uterus...

I have never loved anything like I love my dog

I'm deleting facebook
I'm deleting myspace

I'm sick of people thinking that's what makes us friends
if I'm a friend, you'll keep in touch the old fashion way of a telephone call